After lots happening in my personal life, I am back with an update on the iDONT: it works!
The basic function of a doorbell disconnect using a relay that can be controlled via a web browser. The page is simple enough that it works fine on a smartphone.
The code is located here: https://github.com/SpinInven/iDONT/blob/master/ESP32_iDONT_basic_webserver.ino
I am shocked how easy it was to develop the software. There is a growing number of examples and tutorials and I hope the above example helps someone else. I am pleased with the progress with everything except for the security. It is just whatever comes with the basic Arduino wifi example...less than ideal. I don't fully understand what the webserver is doing. This means that I have a long road head for security...no wonder so many products are lacking security, deadlines don't seem to allow for such dives. While I don't mind if people know the status of my doorbell, it is something I plan on addressing.