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Benchoffisms

A comprehensive list of @Benchoffness

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Baby's got the bends.

"""You're going to a carnival, and there's this tent with bizarre 
side show attractions. *do you go in?* Of course you do. 
Because there's weird shit behind that curtain.""" 

- Does context really matter here?

"Stop breaking shit"

- Benchoff to @alpha_ninja when he broke the Hacker Channel for the Nth time with a picture of cats.

"Um, you probably shouldn't do that"

- Benchoff after asking the Hacker Channel if it was possible to access a secret link. It turns out it wasn't so secret.

"We have a damn website. It's this website."

- Benchoff's reply to a request for a website for the Travelling Hacker Box.

"Except it’s not an android. Androids are designed to pass as humans. This is simply a humanoid robot, and the author of this article should be ashamed. I expected more out of Hackaday and Benchoff is a complete idiot. Rabble rabble I don’t have to put up with this clickbait"

- Benchoff goes third person.

"Engineers can follow instructions. I have given you instructions. Ergo…"
"I seriously don’t know what to say. I repeat the same thing, every single week."
"I honestly give up. I can’t explain this any more."

- Benchoff's sanity balances along a knife edge during the Hackaday Prize community voting.

"if Windows.version.beginswith("9")
     return Windows.98"

- Benchoff on why they couldn't name it Windows 9, "because there's some dumbass code out there".

"I'm not here to entertain you"

- Benchoff2015

"Popcorn came before wifi."

- Benchoff on why the 2.4GHz band is now an ISM band.

"People liked it. It had to go."

- Benchoff tells us why he changes things.

"[Editors] sell eyeballs."

- Benchoff only does eyes, ju-, ju-, just eyes.

"I'm just saying, if you have coworkers, don't get blues"

- Benchoff out of context.

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

- Benchoff yelling at the stage when he is complimented for his crucial coffee production work at the Superconference (cheers

@zakqwy).

"So who watched Doctor Who tonight and is now typing fan fiction with one hand?"

- Benchoff uses his write hand.

"God damn our comments suck."

- Benchoff on hackaday.com. comments.

"what the god damn shit is this fuck"

- Benchoff checks out http://www.searlsolution.com/

"yes, yes, let's all congratulate me for thinking someone should do something"

- Benchoff accepts his award.

"Yes, I'm expensing smoke bombs" 

- Benchoff's expense report.

"April Fool’s Day was last Friday, and the Internet was garbage for a day."

- Benchoff was not fooled.

"don't talk shit about the model M"

- Benchoff's precious.

  • 1 × Benchoff

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  • 1
    Step 1

    Be Benchoff.

  • 2
    Step 2

    Go to step 1.

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Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 04/22/2017 at 14:57 point


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Blecky wrote 07/24/2017 at 16:00 point

OH MY GOD!

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oshpark wrote 03/22/2017 at 07:34 point

@Benchoff now in coin form! "Creating the Benchoff Nickel" by Andrew Sowa http://andrewsowa.com/blog/2017/3/19/creating-the-benchoff-nickel  

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Blecky wrote 04/21/2017 at 04:34 point

Wow! OSH Park can get that much texturing on a PCB?

  Are you sure? yes | no

oshpark wrote 04/22/2017 at 05:57 point

Yeah, Andrew Sowa was able to construct a 5 color palette.  The 2 layer FR4 seems to work best.  Our 4 layer is FR408 which is white.  As the silkscreen is already white, it ends up essentially being a 4 color palette.

  Are you sure? yes | no

Aleksandar Bradic wrote 09/14/2016 at 18:51 point

Hey - we're starting to work on the 2016 Hackaday Omnibus, could use some more Benchoffisms :P 

  Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 09/15/2016 at 02:34 point

People here only collect. Only Benchoff can benchoff so he's the one to inquire :-)

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alpha_ninja wrote 04/26/2016 at 17:20 point

new badge! :o

  Are you sure? yes | no

esot.eric wrote 03/31/2016 at 12:31 point

Hah, just stumbled across a few decent #Benchoffisms over at http://hackaday.com/2014/03/05/hackaday-68k-blinking-a-led/

... something about measuring time in DS9-episodes!

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alpha_ninja wrote 12/07/2015 at 06:32 point

new profile pic https://cdn.hackaday.io/ images/resize/600x600/509151449467446088.png

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 12/07/2015 at 06:47 point

I'm noticing a trend:


  Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 12/07/2015 at 07:07 point

:)

  Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 12/07/2015 at 07:12 point

hairy...

  Are you sure? yes | no

K.C. Lee wrote 12/06/2015 at 03:18 point

Need to make a calendar with all the collected (shown as an example of what it would look like)


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Alex Rich wrote 12/04/2015 at 23:21 point

Can't believe the "THERES KOREAN BBQ IN NYC??" question posed to LadyaAda during hackchat has not been included

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 12/06/2015 at 00:41 point

All in good time ;)

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zakqwy wrote 11/18/2015 at 13:43 point

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" - @Benchoff yelling at the stage when he is complimented for his crucial coffee production work at the Superconference

  Are you sure? yes | no

Benchoff wrote 11/18/2015 at 17:07 point

I Boo'ed whenever I was mentioned.

IN OTHER NEWS, making coffee was insane. Giant, 4 gallon percolators on a 110 supply. Do you know how long it takes to heat up four gallons of water? I'm changing those coffee makers to 220.

  Are you sure? yes | no

Kumar, Abhishek wrote 11/18/2015 at 05:15 point

@Yann Guidon / YGDES sure, but (i) You'd have to remain online all the time, (ii) It's #Bleckyness, not #Bleckyisms ;)

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Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 05:17 point

Nobody is perfect (and I'm not nobody)

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Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 02:45 point

How can Bleky be sure that this list is comprehensive ?

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/18/2015 at 03:01 point

Blecky sees all!

  Are you sure? yes | no

Yann Guidon / YGDES wrote 11/18/2015 at 03:06 point

Hmmm maybe it's time to start the #Bleckyisms project ? :-P

  Are you sure? yes | no

esot.eric wrote 11/16/2015 at 14:13 point

I think you need a "best-out-of-context" section... Scrolling backwards through the logs, this one-liner is fun: "I'm just saying, if you have coworkers, don't get blues"

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alpha_ninja wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:22 point

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davedarko wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:32 point

PK¯2mGblah.txtUX ìñEVêñEVõÊQ

€ À«¼¿ºA'ð[.¸dúéö‰ß3a¹ñ¢yUô$ÄWÑâ†Ã‰0x’ÝråÒYdlË
D=íMZÁd
ûúPK÷}ITPK¯2mG÷}IT @¤blah.txtUXìñEVêñEVPKB

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danjovic wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:45 point

starts with PK?  Is it a ZIP file?

  Are you sure? yes | no

alpha_ninja wrote 11/13/2015 at 16:13 point

well that backfired. :P

  Are you sure? yes | no

davedarko wrote 01/21/2016 at 10:58 point

not sure why I didn't do this before, here is the content of blah.txt: I'm not sure what you did, but I'm sure it will take you a while to decipher this ;) 

UPSI. Danjovic. The man. I took 'Hex Fiend' and saved the hex to a zip file. 

  Are you sure? yes | no

danjovic wrote 11/13/2015 at 14:56 point

I'm not sure what you did, but I'm sure it will take you a while to decipher this ;)

Used Notepad++ and python

Now try to crack that. You may not break it with a X86, but surely will do with a Z80


3f 3d 24 1d 00 37 3a 31 2a 38

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/17/2015 at 04:10 point

Oh haha, that's what alpha_ninja had in their ninja zip file. 

I'll give you all a hint (that alpha_ninja observed), the original values were ASCII chars and there is a reason why the above is all even hex values.

  Are you sure? yes | no

esot.eric wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:53 point

wtf, that ain't ascii....

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:54 point

Nope ;)

  Are you sure? yes | no

esot.eric wrote 11/13/2015 at 08:57 point

well, crap... is it a Benchoffism, or a description of one?

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Blecky wrote 11/13/2015 at 09:01 point

Its an unfulfilling Easter egg.

  Are you sure? yes | no

Aleksandar Bradic wrote 10/16/2015 at 04:44 point

hey Blecky - I am planning on including these into the 2015 Hackaday Omnibus as "motivational posters" :) - example: 
 Hope that's OK! I'll make sure to credit you ;)

  Are you sure? yes | no

Blecky wrote 10/16/2015 at 04:52 point

Perfectly fine :D

The more Benchoffness, the better!

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alpha_ninja wrote 10/12/2015 at 02:37 point

New quote: "Popcorn came before wifi."

  Are you sure? yes | no

zakqwy wrote 10/08/2015 at 15:40 point

omg thank you for this

  Are you sure? yes | no

Richard Hogben wrote 10/08/2015 at 13:38 point

SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT

  Are you sure? yes | no

Radu Motisan wrote 10/08/2015 at 09:29 point

haha Blecky, this is funny .

  Are you sure? yes | no

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